How satisfied you feel in your relationship has to do with
how connected you feel to your partner. Research suggests
that our ability to connect with others (our attachment
style) is influenced by our childhood experiences. According
to Prior and Glasser (2006), 65% of children can be
classified as having a secure attachment style, with the
remaining 35% having an insecure attachment style.
As an adult, an insecure attachment style is associated with
a slew of relationship troubles, including jealousy, obsession,
and emotional highs and lows. The good news is that,
regardless of your present pattern, you can become more
securely attached, or connected, to your partner by
developing a deeper friendship. To do that, incrementally
spend more time with her doing something you both enjoy.
Also, regularly ask for updates on your partner’s likes,
dislikes, current stressors, and new interests, as people
change over time.
9. Appreciate each other
Remember when you first started dating, how you used to
go that extra mile to impress her? Well, one of the secrets
to a long, fulfilling relationship is to continue to actively
appreciate your partner. You don’t necessarily have to pull
out all the stops the way you did back in the day, but
regular efforts to show your partner that you appreciate her
will do wonders for improving your relationship.
If you’re not sure where to start, a good place is by doling
out daily compliments . Tell her she looks hot or thank her
for organizational abilities when she reminds you to call
your mother. The only rule is to make sure that you
genuinely mean what you say.
8. Concentrate on the present to
ensure your future
Interestingly, the ability of your relationship to weather
tough times has a lot to do with your mutual availability in
the here and now. Unfortunately, over time, for a variety of
reasons, many couples move further apart from each other,
meaning that when a rough patch hits, their relationship
doesn’t survive. To build a rock-solid relationship, start by
acknowledging rather than ignoring the ordinary moments in
your relationship. If your partner wants to share something
she’s reading on the net, for example, take a minute to
listen, even if you simply grunt in response. It may sound
strange, but if you accumulate enough of the little things,
when you really need your partner, you’ll find she’s there
for you.
To be ccontinued
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